Tuesday, March 31, 2009

a little of this, a little of that

As much as i hate the posts where people sit here and blog about the blogging slump they are in, I have decided to do just that.

I'm going to pretend that people don't read this thing and just write what's in my head. Because, after all, that is why I wanted to begin blogging to begin with.

The past few weeks have been so different for me. Usually during the winter, I hit a serious low. Like the kind of low that makes me realize that I really should be on meds for that time... like seriously. Although I have so many exciting things in my life, it seemed that it didn't really hold that slump at bay this winter, which was even more depressing.

In any case, as I've written about on here, I have begun running. Not only that, but I decided to go a step further and actually join a gym! I went back and forth in my head about it before ultimately deciding that it was the right decision for me.

Since joining, I have found that I so look forward to going. I used to wonder what kind of drugs people had flowing through their veins when they would talk about how much they loved going to the gym... well, I understand now. Maybe it's that I have so many things going on in my life, it's really nice to have that hour or so all to myself.

As a result of building more discipline into my life in this way, I have seen all kinds of good things happening in my life. I feel more energized, empowered and confident about myself. I, however, have also begun to see so many of my shortcomings in a clearer light. I think that this is because I am not ignoring all my faults because I feel powerless to overcome them, but rather I am seeing them now because I know that I can actually do something about it.

I'd like to say that I think i'm growing up a lot... I mean, seriously, I'm 24 years old. I'm a grown-up. But I don't think anyone ever really grows up. I will probably be like 89 years old and saying the same thing. It's a dangerous place to be to think that you've figured it all out, or that you don't have more to learn. I have a hard time with people who flaunt their knowledge and life experience in my face as a way to say that they have a leg-up on me.

Moving right along.

So as not to make this post entirely self-reflective I will now begin moaning about how many pictures i have not been taking. I have a plan in place to get myself organized so that my workflow becomes a more streamlined process. I think that I don't take pictures because it's so time consuming to do them the way I actually like them. Therefore, probably this weekend I will be implementing my new plan to make that happen.

Speaking of this weekend, I have my first wedding to photograph. I am so nervous and so excited all at the same time! I have so far booked 3 weddings this year and have one more in the works. I have at least one for next year and have been booking for other shoots throughout this summer!

I never would have thought a year ago if you had asked me, that I would be where I am right now. Seriously. Never.

That seems to be all that I have running through my mind right now (at least all that I can write down appropriately ha) Tomorrow I will be taking a picture of myself in the dress again. I have actually lost some more weight since last time, so I'm hoping that it fits better than before. Not that i'm complaining about before... it would be nice though :)


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